Cumulative Fatigue

Yesterday morning was rough.

Got up nearly at my usual time, which is waaay too F’king early with sharp needle-like pain behind both eyes, a slight touch of nausea and later on some loose bowels (to much information).  Still soldiered on prepared my provisions as I always do, and crashed……  By the time I woke up I would have/should have already been in the city.

Felt better and  said to myself, F this came in later than the start time, but only lost 30 minutes of pay. Still what I experienced is nothing to take lightly.

Saw in an e-mail the project wants to take on more Japanese fluent reviewers.  The ad said the project is to last 3 to 4 months, which is good for me I guess income-wise, but considering how exhausted I am now…. maybe not so good?  Wife unit doesn’t mind me working shorter hours, but the difference in what put in the bank account is…..

But today, New Year’s Eve, is a day off as is tomorrow.  So I sit where wife unit works (she can’t park the car on the lot, so I under the guise of being a customer, drop her off and park) drinking some coffee and reflect that in Japan now, its almost a half an hour past 元旦.  No special plans for us as she has to be back in at work at 6 am tomorrow. Same for son unit who is away on a business trip in Indiana; he works today and tomorrow.

But reflecting a bit on life and how I view things compared to others,

Despite my now chronic condition, I am still relatively healthy.  I am not, like a neighbor,  faced with a terminal illness. And my mind is sound-though wife unit may disagree a bit.

Yes, son unit has student loans up the wazoo, but he has a JOB,

Yes, I wish I could do better for employment than I am, but its a JOB and I can write checks without a nervous eye on the checking account while the job lasts.

I know I am lucky to have things I see many in DC (the homeless) do not. The luxury of a hot shower the  morning, a soft warm bed to sleep on, clean clothing, food, and above all a roof over my head that in 3 short years can be all mine.

A son who is not very emotional outward but still thinks enough of me to buy me a small souvenir while on  a recent business trip to Canada- a sure sign I’ve done at least one thing right in my life.

Anything else is just 贅沢

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