Son must have been in an expansive mood today; he decided to use what was left of his pizza gift card and his own money to buy supper for us all, well not the dog.



Maybe I ought to take him to a good bar and see how expansive he can get.  😉

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22 Responses to はじめてのおごり

  1. cat says:

    Whats that in the foil tray?

  2. Waterbaby says:

    what's ogori? gori is pushing one's ideas/self forward but i don't understand it in this context or is there another?

  3. An Ex-Expat says:

    Its supposed to be lasagna, but it looks more like mush and is as salty as a salt lick.

  4. An Ex-Expat says:

    Ogori means to treat someone to whatever, a meal, a drink, tickets to a movie, …

  5. Waterbaby says:

    ah, of course! now I remember! seven years out of japan and my japanese is turning rusty (though i do occasionally dream in it at night, which is kinda frightening).

  6. An Ex-Expat says:

    Why would that be frightening? I sometimes have dreams in Japanese, and at times in color too.

  7. Waterbaby says:

    I was bein' funny; frightening 'cause of how it eked into my psyche despite my frustrations with the spoken language.

  8. An Ex-Expat says:

    Hmmm Perhaps you ought to take the 'How Asian Are You?' quiz (if you believe in those things) on Facebook. I supposedly am a "stuck Asian', whihc I would dispute. Much did of course rub off on me during my time there, but as one of the great 20th Century Philosophers, Popeye the Sailor said, 'I am what I am and that's all that I am." and that's why I live here.

  9. Waterbaby says:

    No need, I've known since a little girl how Asian I am (have often said I'm an Asian trapped in a Western body). So for me, being in Asia (and Japan specifically) wasn't so much a case it it rubbing off on me as me being in the place I instinctively recognize as home. I comparatively struggle much more with being in America.

  10. An Ex-Expat says:

    Hmmm that is very enlightening. I guess it depends much on personal experiences. There is a very good friend I have known for many years, in Nagoya, who was brought to the U.S. by her family, and she lived in Ft. Lee NJ (for the longest of time, I thought she lived on Long Island, so you can imagine the letdown 🙂 ) and did not return to Japan until junior high school (she told me once she actually considered running away from home instead of going back because she thought there was not electricity there and that water buffalo plowed the rice fields). She's more of a Western woman trapped in her body and culture.

    Another woman I knew from work, the product of a mixed marriage, spent much of her childhood going from U.S. base to U.S. base and at one, Norfolk, I think, she really had a bad time, and she prefers Japan than here.

    My son, is pretty ambivalent about it all, but I'd say he's well-adjusted and comfortable here. But he does use his Asian part of him in e-mail addresses, etc. His name too is a Japanese name, which if shortened can be either a Japanese name or a western name.

  11. Waterbaby says:

    Interesting. Reckon it comes down to this: Who we are on the outside does not necessarily reflect who we are on the inside. I knew Japanese who were more Western than I … and who like that woman not from Long Island (lol) are trapped in the wrong body and/or culture. I know for a fact that in Japan specifically, torture is being caught between the two worlds … that for the sake of sanity and peace of mind, one needs to either be wholly Japanese or other/gaijin. That middle space that combines the two is verrry tough and frankly I wouldn't wish it on anyone, though I know it happens a lot. And then you have people like your son for whom cultural resonance is not a strong part of their soul, life purpose or genetic makeup. Pretty easy to navigate in the world.

  12. An Ex-Expat says:

    As far as son goes, I think the main thing is except for one instance, he's not had his Japanese side thrown in his face, as he had his western side thrown in his face in Japan (one of the reason why I brought him back here to grow up). This may be due to him living up to now in a very culturally, racially diverse part of the country. But I would agree with you about being caught in a nether world, it must be hell as my friend in Nagoya, would probably admit to.
    But going a bit further, I would say part of the reason for the 苦しみ lies with the rigidity and conformity of Japanese culture- as my friend would attest to; she was bullied badly upon her retunr as her Japanese was "変"

    Speaking of Japan, the wife is now watching Kill Bill 1 and says its 日本の恥

  13. Waterbaby says:

    I understand the Japanese culture intimately and well (and in fact better than my culture of birth, with which I've never identified or resonated); that's just who I am and it has nothing to do with my childhood influences (in fact, I didn't grow up around any Asians or their influence at all). Everyone's unique and your son may have weathered or withstood the Western stuff thrown at him in Japan, or not, but it's moot. I feel for the Japanese who live abroad (or have extensive contact), then return only to be ostracized and/or bullied but that's Japan; no judgment, I only listen and observe. It's a beautiful culture and brutal.

  14. An Ex-Expat says:

    Its a beautiful culture from which there is much to observe and learn from, but it would be more vibrant and have more depth if it did not also have its brutal side to it.

  15. Waterbaby says:

    It is what it is. More depth? It's far deeper and richer than this culture, an infant in comparison.

  16. An Ex-Expat says:

    Oh yes, I wold agree that comparatively, there is a vast difference in depth as far as history goes. But, and perhaps it is a matter of not completly expressing thoughts, the diffrence is that the depth here lies in the easier willingness of the culture as a whole (yes, I know there assholes in nearly every corner of this country if you look hard enough. The question is, are you going to let one spoil your whole day?) to accept and assimilate something different and foreign.

    Japan is still not there yet, despite years, and years of talking about 国際化. It will be when the day comes and I pick up The Japan Times and see that instead of Englsih teachers in the Help Wanted section, I'll see ads for project managers, engineers, managers.

  17. An Ex-Expat says:

    PS, Its was an early morning today and will also be tomorrow. The eyelids have grown a wee heavy, and a sign I need to call it a day.

  18. Waterbaby says:

    now, now, to paraphrase a bit of advice given me: Staying up late is good for yah. 😉 What's another five hours? 😉

  19. I love the dog's expression!

  20. An Ex-Expat says:

    Too many hours. But then I am up now and you I suspect are alseep.

  21. An Ex-Expat says:

    Yeah, well I've got to be careful of the dog. 2 nights ago, while are backs were turned,. she ate wife's dinner completely of the plate set ON the dining table. and this was after she had finshed her own food.

  22. Waterbaby says:

    If you're up anytime before 2 p.m., then yes, I'm likely asleep.

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